Becoming Your Best Self – Top 3 Reasons to Live in the Present

The process of becoming your best self is a journey towards wholeness. Only when we are whole do we move through life with ease, purpose and success. I believe there are five steps towards wholeness.

  1. Accept Responsibility for Your Life.
  2. Focus on the Elements. [Another way to say this is "Work through your Barriers"].
  3. Complete the Past.
  4. Plan for the Future.
  5. Live in the Present.

While most of us see the value in working towards wholeness, sometimes we get stuck in accepting, or practicing, an individual step.

As if wholeness was not enough, here are the top 3 reasons for Live in the Present:

  1. You get to be 100% present and live consciously. All you really have is the moment. The more consciously you live your life, the easier it is to grow and develop and focus on becoming your best self. Being capable of living in the present means that there is very little old stuff dragging you down. In turn, this allows us to put more energy into dealing with our daily life, making it flow more efficiently.
  2. Staying present allows for appropriate responses to your life.. When you live “in” the moment, you respond appropriately and consciously to everything that comes your way. There is no guilt from the past or fear of the future coloring your responses. There are no unresolved buttons pushed which create inappropriate or misplaced responses. It’s a very healthy place to be!
  3. You save on therapy and counseling fees. When you think about the reasons we go for therapy or counseling, the majority of those reasons stem from our guilt or anger from the past and our fears for the future. We very seldom focus on ‘current’ history, except in how it relates to our guilt or fear, our past or future. The beauty of living in the present is that you get to feel what you feel when you feel it. Acknowledging our legitimate feelings at the time allows you to express them and move on. That’s the same as saying no therapy or counseling needed!

9 Fantastic Tips to Help You Buy Great Christmas Presents Without Overspending

It is easy to spend over your budget at Christmas time. Whether you are spending money on presents or luxurious foods to consume, this is the time of year that we usually indulge ourselves. A little overspending is harmless, as long as it is managed well, but many people spend what they cannot afford, leading them into financial difficulty. Others cause themselves extra stress by leaving present buying to the last minute. This generally always leads to bad decision making and is the main reason for overspending choice of gift becomes more limited as we approach Christmas.

Here are some of my handy tips that will help you avoid both stress and overspending. I hope you enjoy them and please share your tips with me by commenting!

  1. I usually work out what I have to spend on gifts in November. I factor everything into my budget; what I will be spending on socialising, on the day itself and then work out what I have left (after the usual every day living costs). Knowing this figure is half of the battle because once you know this, you instantly become more aware of the cost of an individual present compared to the overall budget.
  2. Write a list of everyone that I have to buy gifts for, noting down any present ideas as I go.
  3. I divide the budget by how many people I have on my list and then allocate different amounts to the different people on the list depending on how important they are to me.
  4. I also write a deadline date down on my list for doing all online shopping and finishing off in the shops. I do this because I had an undelivered item a few years ago.
  5. I go online and look for discount vouchers and special deals that I can use to get more for my money. When I have done this I start immediately shopping online, making sure to tick off anyone on my list that I manage to find a gift for.
  6. I get my diary out and plan a few shopping trips. Before I go on these trips I always plan where I need to go so that I can make the most of my trip and once I am at my shopping destination I ‘check in’ to any shops that I am interested in using my smart phone and Facebook – this is an excellent way of getting special deals that are not available on the rest of the internet.
  7. If I have a few people on the list that would like to receive cosmetics or bathing products, I often try and look for 3 for 2 offers in places like Boots or the Bodyshop.
  8. I mark down what I have spent everytime I buy a present so that I can keep an eye on the rolling total.

What Makes a Lawyer a Good Negotiator?

In politics and diplomacy negotiators are at work every day. Some appear to have the gift, the ability to insure that they will prevails. These professional negotiators are successful because they can recognise negotiation before they become immersed in it, and are able to apply certain skills and talents. The essential skills and the ability to prepare and plan. Effective negotiators plan extensively. They assess their own position and that of their opponent. These objectives of the negotiation of said at this stage but are constantly reassessed. Effective negotiators begin any necessary research and while building up a massive detail, consider the possible strategies to test their own assumptions. Appropriate concessions are devised and their opponents are also considered.

Good negotiators think clearly under stress. They are aware of what is happening at any point in negotiation. They have the ability to take an overview of the situation. Intuition is also important, as are good negotiator can sense when an individual is comfortable with the proceedings and whether it is productive to continue. Good negotiators are able to read their opponents signals both verbal and non-verbal. Good negotiators need a sound, practical intelligence. They are flexible and can reject in effective negotiating styles and switch to those which work. They can exercise options are alternatives, even changing some of their original goals when necessary. Good negotiators use different approaches and keep trying until they arrive a workable, mutually convenient solution. They take the view that they are in the process satisfying mutual needs, and are able to explore alternatives and use the resources of both parties to find solutions negotiators articulate issues as problems rather than as demands. They make broad statements which identify problems, rather narrow statements which telegraph their own perceptions of the problem. These are some of the characteristics of good negotiators.